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12/16/2004


Want to try something fun?
Something that doesn't involve flying off of a NASCAR hero's roof?
Something that doesn't involve capitalizing six letters for one word?

Go up to one of your co-workers, a stranger or your bang-buddy and say this.
"What are you doing for Christmas? Wait, I mean ... the holidays."

I guarantee you THIS will be their response:
"I know, right? Jeez, what the butt hump, bang-buddy?"

People have become VERY angry that they have to say 'holiday' instead of 'Christmas'. They are nearly foaming at the mouths over this new attempt to involve everyone in the cheer of the season.
"They have stolen Christmas!" "They need to learn to accept US!"

Everybody take a deep breath. Take a deep holiday breath.

It's going to be O.K.
It doesn't hurt to have an open mind and acknowledge our Jewish, Agnostic, Atheist, Devil-Worshiping, Kwanza-fooling friends.

You don't get pissy when you have to capitalize SIX letters to spell NASCAR, but you all pull out your authentic Alamo bowie knives when you have to say one extra syllable.

Now, try it with me.

"Hello, dude, what are your plans for the hol-i-days?"

Did that hurt? Did Santa still visit you? Is the baby Jesus still historically the cutest wittle baby evah?
Violent Stick People
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