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1/26/2004

Sleepy, groggy, protein-packed and half awake. And then this comes on ...
"Face down in the gut-ter, won't ad-mit de-feat though his clothes are soiled and bah-lack ..."
Damn me like the devil, dorks, them Dropkick Murphys (quoted song being "Barroom Hero") can pump up even the greyest Seattle blues. Motivation to write about rain here.
Before we go any further, dorkles, let me just get something off of my chest. I don't give a fuck that Dennis Miller is a conservative now. However, this is apparently a scoop to every news editor in the fucking country. Everytime I open the paper or go to cnn.com or the other website I'm addicted to even though the fucker that runs it is a puppet for the ragime there is fucking goateed Dennis with his irksome smirk. He's fucking smirksome.
"9/11 changed me," is his usual quote. "I couldn't be a liberal any more, the terrorists made me think harder about this than I had to think about whether they should have pulled a Fredo fishing trip on Coppola's daughter after 'Godfather III'."
I just made that last quote up.
This whole thing bothers me for two reasons.
1.) Who gives a fuck? Mike Myers isn't funny any more, why should you stay the same.
2.) I am bothered by people who use 9/11 as a soap box for their moral staunchness. (Typical asshole: "When I saw the planes hit the buildings I asked God how things could be as such and he said to me 'You are so special, I wish I was there to tickle your belly'. So I ask you to tickle my belly as the Lord would do.") Now if Dennis Miller had been hit by two fucking jet liners then maybe I'd care more about his personal account of the situation.
So, with that said, let's swap weekend stories like a couple little pleated honey bun-dos at the tea station, eh?
Friday night was quiet as predicted.
Saturday was movies (porn and horror).
Yesterday the sexy R. and I went on a little Seattle loop. For those of you who aren't familiar with Seattle, look at a map. We started near Kent, drove up the western shore of Lake Washington to Mercer Island and then took 90 into Bellevue and back down to Kent. Why? Because we hadn't done that before, nosefuck.
We went to our dock and threw bread at the ducks. However, the seagulls were more determined to get the bread and the ducks didn't seem to care whether they got any or not. Maybe it was some twisted bird S&M, master/slave, gull/duck situation. Maybe the seagulls were just faster.
Do you know why one side of a "V" of geese is longer than the other?
Because one side has more geese on it.
R. Girl got me with that one. She was virtually attacked by seagulls!
Virtually (adv.) -about, just about, almost, most, all but, nearly, near, nigh, virtually, well-nigh -- ((of actions or states) slightly short of or not quite accomplished
"Virtually everything on sale!" = "Not everything on sale!"
"Virtually lower prices store wide" = "Not lower prices store wide"
Just a little lesson for you dorks out there in the "virtually"-obsessed advertising-permeated world.
Moving on.
"Cabin Fever" is so wickedly awesome! It's Dorks Don't Rock meets Evil Dead 2.
Protein diet still going. Little sign of progress so far.
I think that's about it, dorks.
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